A Letter To The Past
This letter is being sent to you from the interior of your sun, four thousand years in your future.
Sorry to bother you, but, I need your help. I've been doing some calculations and have figured out what went wrong. It all has to do with time travel. Let me explain:
There is this guy. He is very Intelligent, creative,and good looking.
Okay it's me.
I was surfing the net one day and put together the information I found on four different pages. I knew how to make a time travel machine!
I built a small demo and sent half a mouse two minutes into the future. Poor little guy.
A wizened old man ran into the room, jabbering that he was me and some junk about big headed mutants. I said shut up, hit him in the chin, and knocked the fool flat.
He couldn't be me, he was very ugly.
In the next room was a time travel machine, so I went back and killed Hitler. I thought, who was the biggest A-hole in history? I'll kill him and be a hero!
I came back and everything was different. Nixon had wrested control of the government and it was BAD.
I went back and tried to change the timeline back, but things got worse.
I went back and changed; worse, back and changed; worse, till I ended up here.
I even tried to go back and stop myself, but we know what happened.
So. You are probably saying to yourself, "What does this have to do with me?"
I have caculated that if I were to become a millionare I would be too busy to ever invent the time machine.
Send $19.99 (check or money order) to:
Save the Universe foundation