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a treatment for a
feature length comedy


Patrick Aull


AUDREY and IRWIN KIRKABEE are a modern day couple. They stand in a big city airport waiting to board their plane. They are about to embark on a round the world vacation that they have just won for placing first in the Wacky Flakes jingle contest. Irwin is excited by the prospect of the trip but Audrey is suspicious and cynical. There seems to bit a bit of a delay with their aircraft out on the runway.

AUDREY (looking at her watch) This is all wonderful, but I
think we have a plane to catch?
CYNTHIA (the desk agent) (giggling) A plane? AUDREY Yes, they have an odd tendency
to gather at airports?
CYNTHIA Oh! Of course, that's flight
541 at gate 31.
Mr. Wimble appears from off screen. MR. WIMBLE Flight 541? One moment please. He whispers energetically into the agents ear. Her eyes open wide. Irwin and Audrey stare, perplexed. CYNTHIA It appears there is going to be
a slight delay in your flight
plan. We seem to be having a
small problem with flight 541.

INT FLT. 541:

The camera pulls back from a close-up of a mad, desperate face to reveal two hijackers armed to the teeth with rifles and explosives. Their weapons are pointed at each other. One is dressed in a business suit, the other like an Arab terrorist. The passengers hands are all raised in the air.

TERRORIST #1 Alright then! We'll put this to
a vote! Everybody who wants to be
hijacked by me, raise your hands!
TERRORIST #2 Hey!! INT. TERMINAL TICKET DESK: AUDREY A problem? Well, how long will
it be?
CYNTHIA We should have it cleared up in
about ten minutes.
Through the window behind Irwin and Audrey there is an explosion on the runway and the plane that is there bursts into a ball of flame. CYNTHIA (without pausing) Well, maybe just a little longer
than ten minutes. Perhaps you can
stay in our Courtesy Lounge until
we can find another flight?
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